Yes to Monogamy?

According to a North American study, one of every two women over 35 years old has committed an infidelity. And, 50 per cent of men and 35 per cent of women have cheated on their partners at least once.

What is it that drives a person to want to be with someone else?. “Monogamy is not guilty of infidelity. It is a subject that goes far beyond the merely cultural aspect.

In past times or even in certain civilizations, there is polygamy, bigamy, monogamy, marriage of convenience or shared marriage and yet, infidelity continues to manifest itself.

This is because the object of human desire is much more than being in love with one person,” says the American sociologist James Francis Neilson.

According to the specialist, the times provide increasingly infidelity as a way of dealing with a relationship. The immediacy with which we live, with which every human being interacts in their daily lives, allows the deceit and makes it very easy to practice.

Every time it happens, there is less tolerance in the family, people have no patience or time to speak about it or to try to find a solution, and so things remain the same.

“You need to replace what you are not happy in time or you can maintain a parallel relationship. The need and lack of tolerance makes both men and women meet their immediate needs,” still sustains the specialist.

From the point of view of the naturality of needs, monogamy is not a natural need. The truth is that only 1 per cent of mammals are monogomous. There is an instinctive way that is not represented in either animals or humans.

“If the man is faithful, it is by pure rationality, but never by natural or physiological need”, reflects the sociologist. Monogamy and fidelity are learned habits. “They are the foundations of a civilized and orderly society. So far, another model to replace the pair has not been found. While questioning the institutions of marriage, families, clans and why couples have fewer children; it is always better to be with someone for a long time and that is what prevails in spite of what the instinct dictates you,” says Neilson.

The explanations on the issue do not justify the pain that the deceit causes. “Freedom is incompatible with love. Many couples recognize the benefits of monogamy and try to practice it without failing, but you have to know that it is not easy to hold on to a partner and that it has nothing to do with being a good or a bad perso”, says the specialist.

The advantages of monogamy

- It facilitates parenting;
- It gives stability to the family;
- It gives the partner organization; and
- More sexual health guaranteed.