Overcoming a separation on days like Valentine's Day is particularly difficult. However, you can do something against the heartache and not only on 14th February.
Everything seems so pink all around you. Your friends want to make some great surprises. They have to show up for their loved ones this year.
Then, there is the good old candlelit dinner or at least a balloon ride. Meanwhile, your single friends send anonymous greeting cards and let others guess who sent them.
What about you? You are characterized as anti-cyclical. You howl a tissue for another sense because Valentine's Day is the day of love and your heart aches. What is there to do?
The pitfalls of single life
Singles know that the calendar has its days which make people’s lives difficult. These are mostly Christmas and New Year, and birthdays, perhaps also the wedding day. But that is not all. In recent years, the marketing industry has another curious snare for Valentine's Day. A red heart and the music everywhere remind you that something crucial is missing from your life.
Even worse, these pitfalls are even more hurtful if you have just separated. It will be merciless for you to stay and realize that there is no one you can be happy with on Valentine’s Day. It does not matter that you single this time of the year. Just buy something so that you can feel the spirit, as someone will definitely be next to you next year.
What can you do for Valentine's Day to be better? And what should be better?
What you can do about the heartache:
- Have a farewell ritual! What day would be better for this than the day of love? Light up the candles, set
the common favorite music, dig for travel photos, love letters and set up the tissues. Take a look at
everything again carefully and then pack it all in a box and store the relics in the basement or the attic.
- You are free to want to do whatever you want without having to take anyone into consideration.
Therefore, you do all the things your ex-partner did not like on this (Valentine's) day. You can listen to
Nat King Cole or Celine Dion, you can finally cook rice pudding again, these being things you often
could not do because your partner did not like them. Pull on your big comfortable sweater and then
spend the evening in front of the TV, watching “Desperate Housewives” or a Hollywood tearjerker.
- Write your partner a letter. Write down all there is in your soul, what a lonely Valentine's Day you have,
what you love to remember, what you liked about them more and so on. The most important thing is to
never send this letter! It may take months for you to read it, but, whatever you do, do not send it.
- Now that you have saved lots of money for the Valentine's gift, you should at least even treat yourself
with something beautiful such as a professional massage, a leisurely haircut, a new DVD...
- Pamper yourself! Buy yourself a Valentine's bouquet and tell the florist that it should have a red heart.
Treat yourself with a visit to the deli or a fragrant bubble bath. Nothing is good enough for you now!
- Steer away! You should arrange to meet someone although you might not feel like going out. An evening
with friends may not bring fun necessarily, but tears, but you can disconnect from the rest of your thought
for some while.
What you should do better as singles
- Wait for a ringing of the phone, for an e-mail or SMS, for the postman, for the delivery man or anyone
else who could bring a little surprise.
- You can call your ex-partner and ask them how they are doing or beg them to come back to you.
- Drink too much alcohol or arrange a chocolate orgy
- Sink in guilt
- Try to clarify the "why" question
- Rash: call their family, your home or plan to emigrate to terminate
Heartache is the worst pain
Although the issue is dealt with very shortly here, we should not forget the fact that heartache is an existential pain that cannot be eliminated with a few simple "to do's."
Whether it is Valentine's Day or at any other time of the year, the old rule still stands true: time reduces the pain. Nevertheless, you should not just wait around, but actively do something for yourself, take good care of you and do not be afraid to seek professional help.
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